Personal blog of christian
writer & fallible mom
Katy McKenna Raymond
in Kansas City, Missouri
Read more Katy at...
LateBoomer.net
Most Recent Posts
- Broke And Broker
- Share Wear
- Buy And Bail, Before It’s Too Late!
- On Bad Behavior And Bailouts
- Fair And Fallible Disclosure
- Classy Men
- Well, At Least I Was WEARING Panties!
- Switching Up The Rhetoric
- The Best Writers Conference Maybe Ever!
- Post Hurricane Ike
- The Mondegreen’s English
- Katy McKenna For President
- Unto The Third Generation
- Feelings, Something More Than Feelings……
- Eau de Sugar-Free Jello
Syndicate
E me at katy @ ngenius.com
How To Know For Sure That You’re Old
All my life I’ve heard people say that you’re only as old as you feel, and honestly, I just don’t get that.
I mean, I hear ancient women proclaiming that hey, they may be 99, but they FEEL 29. I personally didn’t think 29 was anything to brag about. I’ve felt better at many subsequent ages than I did during my twenties, and what’s the big deal about freezing age at 29, anyway? It’s overrated.
My mother-in-law (who, along with my mother, forms the pair affectionately known as The Moms) is about to turn, I think, 87. It doesn’t matter anymore whether I know how old the gal is. SHE believes, and advertises, that she is 63. Why should I think otherwise?
My own mother, a youngster at nearly 78, is quite accurate when asked by the paramedics (which just happened during our last ER run on Thursday night) how old she is. I don’t know, though, whether how old she FEELS might be affected by what year she imagines it to be. What asked THAT question, she came up with an unequivacable “1908.”
(By the way, if I just spelled unequivacable wrong, bear with me. I ain’t getting any younger here.)
I understand the 1908 answer. Really, I do. When you’re born in 1930 and everyone in your family tends to die rather young, I suppose you don’t think you’ll ever be asked a question that requires an answer in the next millenium. Besides, by the time we got to the hospital and the doctor asked her the same question, she succinctly spat out, “2-0-0-8.” So there.
The Moms are aging, that’s for sure. And none too gracefully, if you ask me. But what do I know? I’m just a young whippersnapper, right? You do know that 54 is the new 37, don’t you?
Monday was Doctor Day for Mom. I managed to get her back and forth by myself, but it wasn’t easy. It involves transferring her from a wheelchair to my car (she’s 6” taller and weighs 80 pounds more than I do), hoisting the chair into the back, pushing the chair up steep ramps, leaving her tapping her foot while I run back out to park the car, and then...well, lather, rinse, repeat.
I worked up a bad enough sweat that by the time I got home, I needed another shower. But that’s not the worst part. The worst is that Mom noticed and couldn’t stop mentioning that I talk to myself. A lot.
I don’t do it all the time, but when I’m juggling the Mama, filling out a million forms, praying a kind stranger will appear out of no where and open the door for us, and trying to answer the doctor’s questions about the history of Mom’s urinary tract infections while getting her urinary tract completely confused with my mother-in-law’s, yeah. I talk to myself.
When she heard me say, “Grab Mom’s purse from the back seat,” she brought it up. Later, when I muttered, “OK, Katy, you put her name as the party responible for payment, not yours...” she gave me one of those looks and said, “You’re doing it again.”
On the way home, remembering previous doctor runs, I guess I must have said out loud, “She probably wants a chili cheese dog with extra onions from Sonic...” because Mom blurted out, “You’re getting old!”
Like boomers everywhere, I can congratulate myself on my perennial youth all I want. Apparently, I’m still with-it enough to know when I’m busted.
Too funny! I know I’m getting old, like today, when I mentioned turning 41 later this month, and some of the students replied, “Gosh, you’re older than my mom!” I can’t help but wonder if I’ve been teaching too long....
Posted by on 01/09 at 10:49 AMOh this is so funny I even read it aloud to Bruce. I talk to myself all the time. When I’m at home, I do it aloud in a sarcastic voice. Outside, I mutter. Truthfully, I’ve been talking to myself for years. If it’s any comfort to you Katy, when I worked on Wall Street 20-30 years ago when I was young, everyone talked to themselves because the job was so stressful. Soo...you’re still cool.
Posted by on 01/09 at 11:49 AMBridgie--It is a SAD thing when my baby sister starts to think SHE’S old. What does that say about ME? Funny story about your student..... :)
Suzan--I am glad your Bruce is back home where he belongs! I LOVE it that you talk to yourself in a sarcastic voice!!! So do I!!! (You figured, right?)
Posted by katy on 01/10 at 04:49 PMI always said that if I had one wish, I would wish to live forever. Then I met my husband. All I want to do is grow old with him.
Posted by Online Pet Store on 07/05 at 02:52 PMEven though im 26 sometimes i feel like im getting old. Then I remind myself that every year I gain A LOT of wisdom.
Posted by Bodybuilding Supplements on 07/23 at 03:17 PMIt’s fact but getting old is really hurting.By the great article
Posted by UO Gold on 08/29 at 05:15 AMCruel fact but life never waits for none. Admit it
Posted by ffxi gil on 09/05 at 11:54 AM
Next entry: An Open Letter To All The Remaining Literary Agents I've Not Yet Contacted
Previous entry: Following In His Path
