Katy McKenna Raymond  
Personal blog of christian writer Katy McKenna Raymond in Kansas City, Missouri

Personal blog of christian
writer & fallible mom
Katy McKenna Raymond
in Kansas City, Missouri


Katy is represented by
Greg Johnson at
WordServe Literary

Read more Katy at
LateBoomer.net

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I Will Not Be Afraid Of The Terror By Night, Nor Of The Dream About The Guy Who Breaks The Piano

I’ve written about this before, but I’m not sure I’ve mentioned it on fallible—which is weird in itself, since you probably think that in five years’ time, I’ve pretty much mentioned everything on fallible.

See? You’re not always right!

I wrote an essay once called “So We’re Not The Dream Team,” about how my night life differs so vastly from my hubby’s.

Since the term “dream team” started getting used more widely in the common vernacular during the OJ Simpson trial, which happened after the June 12 car chase involving the white SUV which happened to fall on our son Scotty’s birthday and also on the elder George Bush’s birthday, approximately a dozen years ago if memory serves, you may surmise that this is a very old essay.

See? You got that one right!

Anyway, in that essay I describe my dreams as having all the horrifying, gripping elements of a Stephen King novel with all the special effects of a Stephen Spielberg film. And I contrast my nocturnal style with Doug’s, who dreams of vacuuming.

Yes, my friends. Doug considers The One About Vacuuming to be a high psychological thriller, more compelling even than The One About Having A Theater-Style Popcorn Popper In Our Very Own Kitchen, and that disturbing cult classic, The One Where The Leaky Faucet Stops Dripping.

This morning was so typical.

In the last scene of my many-hours-long nightmare, which was divided into sections by my six trips to the bathroom as distinctly as if a velvet curtain were opened and closed, I lost my mother.

She didn’t die in the dream, you understand—I actually physically lost her.

My father made a cameo appearance in the dream, and with a cast of characters of no fewer than 50,000 to keep track of, I became separated from him, too. But since he’s been dead in real life (and sometimes lively in real death) for 21 years, I didn’t feel liable for losing him like I did for my mother.

The last hour of my sleep—if you can call it that—was spent in a frantic search for Mom, whom I’d misplaced somewhere in the gruesome assortment of vicious murderers, surrepticious thieves, brazen terrorists, sleazy politicians, and other assorted n’er-do-wells, including telemarketers.

In the instant before opening my eyes, I found her. And then before I knew what happened, I was awake and bawling my head off.

“Katy, you’re all right,” Doug said. “It was just a nightmare, but it’s over.”

“I lost my own mother!” I cried. “She’s my responsibility and I lost her! How could I let that happen?”

Doug could not calm me down until he finally said, “Sit up, Katy. You need to get out of bed.”

This may sound like a simple solution to you, one I should have been able to come up with myself. But Doug knew just what to do to help me shake off the horrible dream and separate me from the not-so-awful reality.

But then he went too far.

“If it’s any consolation,” he said, “I had a very weird dream, too.”

I shuddered one of those big shudders that happens when you’re winding down from a good, long sob. “Tell me…”

“I was in a huge auditorium, and this guy was playing a piano.”

“OK…then what?”

“Well, he played it so hard that he broke it.”

“And?”

“Ummm…nothing much happened after that.”

“WHAT? How could it be a freaky dream if nothing much happened? What did you do the rest of the night? Just LIE there?”

He rubbed my back and poured me a cup of coffee. “Why don’t you tell me the rest of your dream, Katy—only if you want to, that is.”

So I told him every bit of it and he hugged me tight and promised he’d be right here with me no matter what—even if I somehow manage to misplace my mother in the craziness of life.

And I realized that even though I’d teased many years ago about us making unlikely bedfellows,  we make a pretty good Dream Team, after all.

Posted by Katy on 11/06/05 at 05:04 PM
Fallible Comments...
  1. Yep, we really have come full-circle when we're now "losing" our mom instead of our children. What a horrible nightmare, Katy. I'm so sorry. Good luck with Mom tomorrow!
    Posted by Bridget  on  11/06/05  at  08:22 PM
  2. Oh, Dear Katy, I think you need a vacation!
    Posted by Amber  on  11/07/05  at  11:46 AM
  3. Bridgie--So far, so good...

    Amber--I do SO need a vacation. Believe me, I'm squirrelling away the quarters!
    Posted by Katy  on  11/08/05  at  01:01 PM
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